How To Make New Friends When You're An Adult

Illustrated by Daniel Koppich.If James Taylor ruled the world, all we’d have to do is call and a BFF would appear on our doorstep. In reality, friendships are among the trickiest relationships out there. As hard as it may be to find romantic love, it’s arguably more difficult to pick a new pal we really hit it off with and keep in touch with buddies from the past. But, that’s no reason to resign ourselves to a lifetime of solitude, especially since having friends is tremendously important for our health and happiness. Check out our guide to friendship, complete with advice on forging brand-new relationships and maintaining old ties.



Twenty-somethings are among the “friendliest” people out there. Nearly everyone in this age group uses some form of social media, meaning they have the constant opportunity to share the minutia of their daily life with hundreds, or even thousands, of connections. At the same time, there’s good reason to believe American adults are getting lonelier. Surveys have found we have fewer friends than we did in the 1980s, and that all those virtual relationships aren’t nearly as satisfying as the in-the-flesh kind. Many people in their 20s and 30s complain they don’t know how to make new friends, or feel abandoned by old ones.



This trend is troubling, given that friendships are important — if not crucial — for our well-being. Some scientists argue that humans are inherently social creatures, wired to benefit from close relationships with family, romantic partners, and of course, friends. Other research suggests a network of close friends can reduce stress and promote good health and longevity. While it’s perfectly reasonable to desire some alone time (c’mon, does anyone really need to know we still watch Spongebob?), nothing can replace the value of a close friendship. Unfortunately making and retaining friends isn’t always easy, but it can be done. Read on for practical ways to widen your social circle.



Your Action Plan: For anyone confused about how exactly to go about forging new friendships or strengthening old ones, here are some tips that are more creative and practical than the old “just put yourself out there.”

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